2.15.23 9

The Pressure On Moms

If you ask anyone a generation above ours they will tell you they don’t envy having to be a parent today. The pressure on moms especially is out of hand. We have to make every day, every holiday, every birthday perfect and Pinterest worthy and it’s killing us.  We are all amazing moms but the pressure has got to stop.

the pressure on moms

The Pressure On Moms

Over the last few weeks, I have felt an immense amount of pressure as a mom. Not really even just the past few weeks. Honestly, it never ends. I know all my friends feel this way as well. There are memes, videos, etc all depicting how overworked, stressed, and overpressured moms are. There are books about. Countless podcast episodes, etc. Moms are TIRED! We have so much pressure on us to make sure life is perfect that it makes it hard to enjoy the present.

What about holidays: Every Valentine’s Day, Halloween, and even July 4th I see people making baskets for their kids with tons of toys and presents. I think it’s very sweet when parents do this but it can also put a lot of pressure on moms and make some of us feel bad. Like maybe we don’t love our kids enough or take the time. But maybe we are all overwhelmed with clutter and the idea of more “stuff” sends us over the edge.

What about birthdays: Gosh birthdays. SO MUCH PRESSURE to have the best party, make the cutest favors, and have everything DIY’d with balloon arches, and all the bells and whistles. When did this become a thing? I have fallen prey to this so many times and this year for Liam’s birthday I just didn’t. You know what he had a great time with his Amazon-purchased decor, balloons, and favors. He told us it was the best party ever. We did donuts instead of cake because he doesn’t even like cake.

What about all the little things: The school lunches that we feel aren’t Pinterest worthy, the holidays we don’t remember to buy 4 special outfits for, the days our kids’ playrooms don’t look like a serene Montessori environment, the times they want 8 hours of TV because you don’t have time to do ALL THE THINGS every day. The pressure never ends. The emotional labor of Dr appts, booking birthday parties, responding to birthday invites, buying gifts for all the kids in the class, assembling Easter baskets, assembling party favors and class Valentines, feeling like you aren’t volunteering at school enough. It truly never ends.

Honestly, though, we are all part of the problem and we perpetuate it by buying into it. The less we buy into it, the less we put the pressure on ourselves, and realize our kids don’t need 99% of these things the better off we will all be. I can assure you NO dad feels this pressure. Moms let’s do better for ourselves, our friends, and most importantly our kids. All they want is US and our love.

What kind of pressure do you put on yourself?

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9 Comments

  1. Cinny wrote:

    I 100% agree, my god, there is so much pressure! I work full time and yet there’s meal prep, making sure all the stuff for school and etc are done and ready as well.

    Published 2.15.23
    Reply
  2. beth wrote:

    Holidays can be really overwhelming for me. That’s why I just like simple celebrations and easy recipes to make.

    Published 2.16.23
    Reply
  3. LisaLisa wrote:

    Interesting post and so many great points! I love being a mom and I enjoy doing what is needed for my children, but it can all be overwhelming at times. Moms are “SUPERWOMEN” in my book because we have to handle everything from the moment our kids are born until they are grown! I’m not that buying mom though I will admit to that!

    Published 2.16.23
    Reply
  4. Aaahhhhh….the patriarchy really has mothers in a chokehold! You just might even think the fathers of these children don’t exist outside siring the children! It’s so disgusting. We need to do better!

    Published 2.16.23
    Reply
  5. Julie wrote:

    It is really commendable that you have taken the time to recognize the immense pressure faced by moms, and are making an effort to address it. Parenting is a tough job, but as you said it is important to remember that your kids just want you (and your love). I can’t imagine raising children during this Instagram and Pinterest era. I applaud you for all your hard work!

    Published 2.16.23
    Reply
  6. This is an insightful and inspiring post that offers a much-needed perspective on the challenges of motherhood. It serves as a reminder that all moms are doing their best and that we should be kind and supportive of one another as we navigate the ups and downs of parenthood.

    Published 2.17.23
    Reply
  7. Monidipa wrote:

    Being a mother isn’t easy and pressure on moms are immense be it a SAHM or working mom, the pressure is something more than anyone will get it. I so loved your post. Really appreciate it.

    Published 2.17.23
    Reply
  8. Blair Villanueva wrote:

    The pressure is on and on, and it is up to us to end the wheel. Or else, we will continue to feel tired and exhausted and that feeling will be inherited by our children.

    Published 2.18.23
    Reply
  9. Dominique wrote:

    There is SO much pressure. This is a great article!

    Published 2.24.23
    Reply