I just finished a book written and put together by the editors of Glamour Magazine called
It got me to thinking….
3 years ago I turned 25 and a lot has happened since then
What do I wish I had known 3 years ago???
I wish I had known….
If he says he’s not ready….he’s not ready: But seriously girls. Guys are what they are. They have issues and they tell you whats up. If a guy says to you on your 5th date ” I don’t want to get married til I’m 30″ LISTEN! If he says to you ” I dont know if you’re the one” You aren’t. If he says “marry me?” Do it!
To be nicer to my mom when I’m tired. She is my biggest cheerleader and sometimes when I’m exhausted or frustrated she’s the one I take it out on. I wish I would have been better about that.
I don’t NEED it. I love nice things: purses, Tory Burch anything and designer jeans are my weaknesses. I will give myself the “but I neeeeeed it” and the reality? I don’t. What I need is a bigger savings account and my student loans to be gone. Yeah I’m not perfect.
Crap happens in life that knocks you on your butt: In the past 3 years 2 things happened that I didn’t see coming: My dad has been diagnosed with Stage 3 Lymphoma and my boyfriend of nearly 3 years and I are no longer together. If you had asked me at 25 if I saw either of these things coming I would have said OH HELLS NO. I have been knocked on my ass, cried my eyes out and thought “why bother?” But you know what I’m still truckin along.
You need 4 friends in life: The one you can laugh til you cry with. The one that tells you like it is. The one that brings out the best in you. The one that brings out your silly/adventurous side. Thank god I have all 4. I have the greatest friends I could ever hope for. They keep me grounded.
Talk to my grandparents more: I have made an effort in the last year or two to call my grandparents a few times a week. Just to say hi, tell them I love them and let them know I am thinking about them. However I wish wish wish I had been taking more time to find things out about their lives. A few years ago for fathers day we video taped my grandparents for 2 hours asking them questions about their childhoods, lives, marriage, raising kids etc. We all have a copy of this DVD and its amazing. It is something I will cherish forever. Word to the wise: If your grandparents are still alive….find out everything you possibly can from them. They know whats up.
What would you tell 25 year old you? If you are under 25 what would you tell 15 year old you?
I would have to say that life is not a race. Slow down and enjoy it. It goes by much too fast.
Agreed! I saw that original article and LOVED IT. Something I wish I had known at 25 is that it’s ok to NOT be married. SO many of my friends were getting married right away, and I am thankful I took the time to figure out what I want before settling down:)
Agreed with all of this! I’d also say that just because your friends are doing it, doesn’t mean you have to do it. Get married when you want, not when the bulk of them are; have kids when you’re ready, not when they are having kids and certainly don’t get divorced because the rest of your friends are either (this is the path my stepsister is following).
I’m 25 now and if I would have told myself that I could have accomplished getting my Masters while putting my relationship on hold for 2 years I thought you were crazy! But I did it, and by the grace of God we’re still together. Sometimes things need to fall apart so other things can come together right 🙂 If you need anything love let me know xoxo from Chicago!
So many changes happen during your twenties. SO MANY. I think I need to do one of these post for “Things I Wish I Had Known at 23” and then 25, and 27…. lol
Neely I LOVE this post! Did you like the book? It is amazing how fast life can change and what you learn along the way. Definitely still thinking about your Dad! He is lucky to have you!
I love this post Neely, and the part about having 4 friends is so so true!
These are SO GOOD! So true– guys won’t usually beat around the bush about things. We just have to be willing to hear what they say. :/
These are fabulous. I love what you said about videotaping your grandparents, because you are right. They know so much. I only have 1 grandmother still alive, so I will be emailing my sister and cousin to get a video tape of her together and a list of questions to ask her. That is perfect!
Also, you are right about boys. They tell you exactly what they want usually, but you have to be willing to hear it and accept it. That is hard for all us ladies to understand.
Save money for a rainy day… whether its no job, break up or you really want something… save….
I’d tell my 15 year old self to stop worrying and enjoy it all. I’m 26, so I’d tell my 25 year old self that you CAN make it through deployment #2. You can and you WILL. So stop worrying about that too.
Great post, Neely!
Such truth! I talk to my grandparents every morning on the way to work, and it has been such a treat to hear about their lives and just know everyday how they are doing!
Great tips of advice!
My fifteen your old self:
I would tell myself to move to my Dad’s sooner.
Tell myself not to waste all of high school having a crush on my best guy friend and just enjoy being single.
Spend more time with my Grandma. & the rest of my grandparents in general.
I would have taken my classes more seriously!
I definitely need to invest more time in my grandparents – they won’t be here forever!
I also wish I had saved more and spent less!
I really loved this post! I feel like raw honesty like what you wrote here is sorely lacking from blogworld more often than not.
I appreciate you sharing this and I agree with you on alot of it!
I’m 26 now, and I think I would tell me 25 year oldself to enjoy the ride. Sometimes I work so hard I forget to love the life I’ve worked so hard for!
It would be a cool follow up blogpost to repost some of the responses you get! : ]
Love,
B
I’m the same way with my mom. She’s so awesome, and sometimes I take her for granted and take my troubles out on her when she lets me vent!
I read that in Glamour this month, too! I like your things you wish you’d known.
Hmm.. some of mine:
* You’ll tell stories about these days for years to come. 🙂 Seems crazy now, but everything will be okay.
* Taking risks is scary, but you’ll never get anywhere unless you take the leap once in awhile.
* Stop overanalyzing. You can’t plan everything. And some of the best things happen when you’re not planning. 🙂
Those are some good pieces of advice. My grandpa and I have kind of a strained relationship. I barely know him. I don’t even think anyone would care about a dvd. Makes me sad 🙁
what a wonderful post! im turning 27 this month but I feel by the time I was 25 I learning these things. I highly suggest having a relationship with your grandparents. I have a very special bond with mine.
xo
This is an amazing post! 25 was the year my life fell apart and turned around. In the past five years I have learned a lot. I would tell 25 and 15 year old me that this you are only here for a little while–live it up!! And don’t waste any time (especially years) over a guy who is not head over heals for you.
Great post! Even though I’m not quite old enough to look back on my 25 year old self yet, I could tell my 20 year old self a thing or two. 1. Be nicer. You never know what’s going on in that person’s life and what your words can do. Little things that you may not thing would bother someone might bother them a lot. 2. Don’t work SO hard. Money isn’t the end all be all. 3. Don’t compare yourself to other people. You’re doing just fine.
I’ve got to read this book! And 25 wasn’t TOO long ago (cough 3.5 years cough) but I definitely wish I’d kept up working out…I was in such good shape, shame on me for letting myself go before getting pregnant…so much harder to drop the baby weight!
I am the same way to my mom! I dont know why I take things out on her. Sometimes I forget she has feelings. See you tomorrow!!
This is all such great advice! Also, I love nice things too much also. Ugh.